Going back to work...

Today was the first day I had to go back to work after Daisy had passed away. This should prove to be one weird day. It started right in the morning. As soon as I got up I immediately looked at Daisy's empty bed. That's where she would usually be in the morning ready to go far a walk. While preparing breakfast I expected her just to walk around the corner to investigate what I was up to. But nothing of that sort happened of course. I went trough the same motions when taking a shower in the morning. Then I got ready for work and of course I did what I always used to do in the morning. Walked over to the couch and got ready to give Daisy a good bye kiss. But of course the couch was empty. When walking out the door of the apartment I almost said good bye to an empty room. Is a routine to let Daisy knew that I was going out to work.
On my way to the tram I met one of Daisy's senior doggy friends...almost made me tear up. As long as I keep busy and don't thing about her I'm kinda fine. I really couldn't have cared less about my work day. Not entirely sure what I was doing all day long, but it did keep my busy. Of course I barely said any word at work. -and I was pretty happy that the phone was barely ringing. The last thing I needed was a bunch of customers calling getting on my nerves with some stupid shit.
I chose not to go an my lunch break. I just wanted to avoid to let my thoughts wander...would probably just make me think of Daisy. So by 5 pm I left work and headed back home. The first thing I did when entering the apartment was to announce to an empty apartment that I was home. Another habit I picked up while Daisy was still around. I guess it will be not that easy to break this habits. And it will be a constant reminder that my companion animal is no longer around. And just to prevent the question. My apartment still just feels like an apartment and not like a home and it feels equally empty as it did yesterday.
But there is some positive development as well. I can look at pix of other peoples dogs and it still gives me joy. Just love to look at a cute doggie face.