While there has been of course a fluctuation on the dating fron over past 3+ years, in recent time there has happened some movement. Not enitrely sure about the reason for it. In recent times I'm been hit on more and more by twinks. While the is of course flattering, it also present an interesting challenge. On the one side the lingo of twinks and a someone in his 40's is quite different. On the other side there is a huge difference in the focus on life. It never occurred to me how much 20 years of age difference make also a huge difference in the way someone looks at things and what is important in life and what isn't.
It seems in your 20's it's all about fun and acquiring material stuff. While in your 40's you do focus way more on your job performance, how to set up a nice and cosy home to relax in and spending quality time with the people that matter to you is way more important than quantity. In your 40's you just don't have rush from one party to the nex, you've learned how to kick back, relax and enjoy yourself. And of course you do at times think of and plan for the day you plan to retire. That's something that would never ever occur to someone in their 20's.
And there is another difference I have noticed. In the time I grew up and first started dating, the things we said did mean something. When we said we were in a relationship it really did mean something. When we said we were in love, it really did mean something. We were much better in expressing our feelings and everyone was cool with it. These days guys tend to get into a jealousy fit just because you don't feel the same way about them or don't have the time to chat an any given moment. It seems that terms like relationships and being in love with someone is not much more than a Facebook status update anymore. It really doesn't seem to mean much these days. Guys in their throw around with those terms so quickly and they change in an instant. It would make great material for a comedy if it weren't so sad. But for me it has somewhat of an entertainment value.
Of course I do question the motives why these guys are hitting on me. Some of them might just be bored and looking for someone to break up their boredom. Some of them might look at someone in their 40's as the means to refinance themselves. After all guys being in their 40's supposedly have their life together, know where they are heading in regard in their occupation and they are supposed to be financially stable. Some of those guys might not even know exactly where they belong and looking for a way to find out their place sexually. Some of these guys might just look for a mentor and/or father figure. Some of those might just use this venue to get them out of their econmically rather poor coutries, since lots of them seem to be Asians. And for young guys from Asia it might as well be a cultural thing. It might just be that "having" and older partner is kind of a cultural status symbol for them.
I do chat with some of those guys who are more interesting. After all it's always fun to get an different perspective of things. Do I really take that hitting on me seriously. Nope, I don't. I do let it happen and see where it goes. Of course I do know, that it isn't very likely that someone that much younger is gonna end up being your next longterm partner. But of course there is a remote possibility that this might happen. In your 40's it's not about a guys physical attributes or differences that might be attractive in the short run, it's about finding a guy with whom you share the same interests and a similar set of values. And of course someone who makes you happy and smile.
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